August 15th

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From the aspiration of being Shadile Shezi of Nigeria to a child prodigy like Naajim saakib; I couldn’t believe it’s gone already. Living everyday as a prisoner of my wish, I still afford to squeeze its every moment to playing away those noble dreams. I became lost in my world and the world to be mine. Confusion sets in, doubts takes control and a once bright and bloomy future seems gloomy, dark and dry.

At times it seems it’s not even gonna get better. From countless soliloquy to deafening dumbness, talents inbuilt slips away moving ‘’like this and like this’’ like ‘’Nigeria’s economy’’.  In short, a thousand Buhari can’t fight to get  back the purity of this heart that has been ravaged with corrupted files of surreal wishes that even Alice might not have come across in wonderland.

I have for long squandered my popsy’s money fa! From countless days his cloths met their waterloo from those dreadful irons, few minutes to go for an outing, to foods so delicious like a well garnished broth which they took without complain. All at my hand! Their thought is simple: he is still growing up! He would change!  I still remember vividly those days of WAECs, NECO and JAMBs not to talk of the expensive tutorials running concurrently with transport upkeep. Hmmm, how patient were they! My antecedents, I would confess, makes me scared of even becoming a parent.

SS1, if I wouldn’t forget, was when I stopped to bed-wet finally. Those moments were legendary. No one would teach you the skills of hiding your cover that I even clap at my genius especially when you and your siblings live in a one room apartment and you do your bidding without being caught. I think I would employ that sense of ingenuity to my life as my dreams have been lying jobless for so long.

A day it was when I slept off on the central couch in the living room. A Ramadan it was! Dreaming of playing football with friends and afterwards going to the toilet to pee, Alas! It wet the couch so bad as I need to go back and meet my imaginary friends and continue the so important play. Before long, I realized my folly. With quick alacrity, I packed my robe, dumped them in inconceivable hidings, took and piece of cloth added water to the couch and  I started scrubbing hard for the couch needs to be dry before 5:00am when everyone converge in the living room for sahur. Sure, it was where my parents would sit. Lol! Wallahi even a smell was perceived by my sharp nosed Mum. The rest is history.

The man I want to be. The dreams I wanna achieve! It dawned on me that I have no more excuses. And no more regrets.

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